I could be smarter and a better artist.
$38,000 would buy:

• Enough wood, glue and nails to make 3,800 stretcher bars
  
  
• 3,800 tubes of oil paint
  
  
• 4,470 movie admissions
  
  
• 904 years of The New Yorker
  
  
• 826 years of ArtForum
  
  
• 1,900 hardcover books
  
  
• 4,470 museum admissions
  
  

Depressing, isn't it?    </end>